Love the HELL out of them

Love the HELL out of them

In this great world, we have all kinds of people. We are shaped with different personalities. We have different outlooks on life. We react to certain situations differently. Today, I want to talk about the type of people my grandmother would call a “HELLish” person or a “HELLraiser.” We know people that will raise HELL all day for what appears to be no reason at all. We find ourselves asking what the HELL is wrong with them. Some of us get fed up and will tell them to just go to HELL.

My challenge to you today is to look at them through the eyes of God and start loving the HELL out of them. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7 NIV). Just as Christ cares more about the why than the what, we should too. A “HELLraiser” or a “HELLish” person has some internal suffering in their heart and mind. There is a root to every thing that grows, good or bad. We have got to start doing what Jesus did for us. We have to love the HELL out of them.

Often times we forget that love covers a multitude of sin, their sins too. We forget how we were pre-Christ. Love will draw people. Love will make people change. It’s with love and kindness that he drew us. It’s his endless love that changed us. He loved the HELL out of us (emotionally and eternally). Let us imitate Christ when dealing with the HELLish, HELL-raisers we encounter.

If your spouse is acting up, love the HELL out of them. If your children are rebelling and being disobedient, love the HELL out of them. If your boss is down your back, love the HELL out of them. If your family has turned their back on you,love the HELL out of them. What did it take from God for you to change? It was love, because love never fails. In closing, Love the HELL out of them!

FEEDBACK QUESTIONS:
In what ways can you love the HELL out of people?

What is the most difficult part of loving the HELL out of someone?

What are some challenges you may face when trying to love the HELL out of someone?

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No Relationship is perfect!!!

No relationship is perfect

A young lady came to me with the concern that others thought her marriage was phony because she posted about her husband a lot. My first thought was “Tell them to go step on a thumb tack.” My second thought was “Block them and keep it moving.” My final thought was “Enlighten them.” Needless to say, I went with the final thought.

“NO RELATIONSHIP IS PERFECT”

When I first got married I was such a hot head. I would tell my husband to go to hell with gasoline drawers on. I would constantly show him that I didn’t need him. I would leave when I wanted to. I talked to him as if he were a school aged boy. I would embarrass him in front of people. I had no respect for him at all. I made decisions without him. I did not care if he liked it or not. I did what I wanted to do.

One day I was sitting in church, I had a vision. In the vision I was walking behind my husband yelling at him. He had bags in his hands. He placed the bags in his car, a drop top silver convertible mustang (I loved that car) and he left. My immediate reaction to the dream was “The devil is a liar.” Months went on without me ever thinking about it again. We traveled down home to visit family. My husband and I got into an argument in front of my family. I was really doing all of the arguing. He was walking away. When we got home my husband told me that my family said “If I didn’t stop talking to him like that he was going to leave me.” I was livid. I thought, “How is my family going to talk against me?” I had the same vision again about a year later. I had the same reaction to the vision “The devil is a liar.” A series of incidents happened in my marriage. It got uglier and uglier. The arguments grew worse. It got so bad we didn’t even talk to each other when we came home. It was pure turmoil. Eventually, my husband deployed to a combat zone. One night during the middle of a phone argument he said, “I filed for a divorce. You should receive the paperwork in a few days.” I totally disregarded what he said. I thought he was just saying it in a fit of anger. I fired back with “It’s cool. I will sign them with no problem. I’m tired anyway.” A week passed by, I got off of work. I checked the mailbox. To my surprise, I saw a thick envelope addressed to me from a divorce attorney. My heart sunk. I couldn’t believe my eyes. I was angry. I was hurt. I was embarrassed. I was SHOCKED! He called that night and we talked about it. We tried to work through things afterwards but to no avail. Here I was two years after my vision, DIVORCED! This was one if the loneliest, hardest, most painful roads I had to travel.

During this period of separation, God showed me, ME. He showed me my ugly self. Though the divorce was painful, I was engulfed with so much knowledge and wisdom. I was brought to this scripture: “A wise woman builds up her house and a foolish one tears it down.” As much as I hated to admit it, I was such a foolish woman. I allows my pride, my mouth and my ignorance to help destroy my marriage. From my foolishness I learned the value of being a wise woman and the destruction caused in being a foolish woman.

I wrote something called “A Wise Woman”

A wise woman builds up her house and a foolish one tears it down. A wise woman understands that she will eat the fruit of her lips. She understands that she can speak life or death into her marriage. A wise woman knows that she has the power to speak those things that be not as though they were. A wise woman knows that the same women listening to her problems will be the first to play the clean up woman. A wise woman doesn’t give place to the devil in her marriage so she continues to edify her husband even if he isn’t acting the part. She edifies because she knows that God doesn’t call the qualified but he qualifies the called. A wise woman also understands that submission is not slavery but its submitting to the mission in the man God has placed as head of her household. She understands that submission to him is a commandment from God and when she obeys God blessings, answered prayers and change follows.

Don’t be so quick to say that a woman is doing too much or a relationship is fake. You may be aware of problems they may have had. But understand that the woman is not faking it or trying to make her marriage appear perfect. She is refusing to be foolish. She is “A wise woman.”

On another note, I applied these principals to my life and God restored my marriage ONLY 5 months later! We remarried and renewed our vows!

FEEDBACK QUESTIONS:

What would you consider a foolish woman?

What do you think is the number one cause in divorce besides money and infidelity?

What other principles could be implemented to have a healthy, happy marriage?

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HURT PEOPLE, HURT PEOPLE

I ran across a post of a Christian who was highly upset with a customer service representative’s actions. From the details of the post, she had every reason to feel the way that she felt. Personally, one of my biggest pet peeves is a customer service professional with a horrible attitude. I’ve often said “If you hate your job that much, QUIT! Well we all know, it’s a different story when the shoe is on the other foot.

My previous work history consisted of about 10 years in the customer service industry. I started in customer service in high school working at a local Taco Bell. Looking back, I had one of the worst attitudes EVER when dealing with customers, managers, PEOPLE! In my own right, if you got nasty with me the show was going to get interesting because the battle was on. I did not care who you were. I had little to no respect for authorities. I felt like I had every right to treat you just like you treated me.

As I grew, I found out some deep things about myself. I was really angry. I didn’t truly understand why I was so angry. I was so quick to be defensive. There was a wall there I couldn’t understand. I didn’t know how it got there or why I couldn’t let it down. I fought ALL of the time either physical, mentally, verbally or emotionally. One day I listened to myself. I was so disgusted with myself I begin to cry uncontrollably. With tears streaming down my face and a heart that couldn’t seem to be repaired, I asked God “What is wrong with me?” I said, “I don’t like being like this!” My mind travelers back to the smiling 9 year old girl that was bubbly, full of joy and always smiling. I said “God I want the life that little girl had. I want to laugh smile and be full of joy again.” God spoke to me “Forgive.” I sat puzzled for a minute as I reflected on what he said. The age 9 was very significant for me. God was showing me why I was like I was. The 9 year old girl was so happy. the next year turned out to be the most dramatic change of my life. It is what caused me to be angry, defensive and lose respect for authority. The incident filled me with fear, rage and worthlessness. It caused me to never want to feel that kind of pain or vulnerable again. It was the beginning of the wall of protection I never wanted to let down. At the age of 10, I was RAPED twice and FONDLED a third time.

You may be saying, what does this have to do with the story? The moral of the story is HURT PEOPLE, HURT PEOPLE. When the young lady snapped like that know that it’s much deeper than her hating her job. We have to take ourselves out of the equation. Get over ourselves and evaluate the actions. People do not wake up and just decide to be mean, hateful, spiteful. There is a reason behind every action. This doesn’t mean that we just allow people to mistreat us. It doesn’t mean that we justify or excuse their actions. It does mean that we need to take a deeper look realizing that its more than what meets the eye.

For years, I was this same young woman. I was angry at the world because of what happened to me. I thought I had forgiven them but in reality I only suppressed the pain. I pushed the incident so far in the back of my mind. I wouldn’t allow myself to face it because the pain was almost unbearable. I was only causing internal damage to myself. I had to face the pain in order for me to be healed. I had to forgive so that I could be set free. I had to forgive to take back my power and authority. I had to forgive so that I could be happy, bubbly, joyful, ME!!

When someone hurts someone else, pray for them! As you’re praying, ask God what he would have you to do. Think about it. He could’ve allowed her to snap on anyone but he let her snap on YOU (one of his chosen). Why you? Because he knows you have in you what’s necessary to get a prayer through for her. Like me, she probably has suppressed this hurt for so long, she doesn’t know how or why she acts the way she does.Think about a baby who hurts theirselves. All they know how to do us scream and cry to let us know they are hurting. Adults also do what they know to do to express the pain their feeling.

FEEDBACK QUESTIONS:

Why do you think it’s so hard to forgive?

Is it easier said than done, Why?

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Not always the same

Don’t get caught up in God doing things the same way all of the time. Don’t read the same scripture without expecting God to reveal more to you from that text. God’s word is refreshing and renewing. It revives and restores. So each time you read a text it should do something new in you. God is saying each path, each trial, each deliverance, each healing will not be done in the same manner. The thing that does remain the same is that I am the God who does it all. I am the same God today, yesterday and forever. Be blessed! ~Author Shamieka Dean~ #motivationsbyMieka

Still trying to figure it out?

Do you find yourself in a place saying “I’ve got to figure out a way to do this. I don’t know how I’m going to do this.” Today I’m telling you to, STOP IT. God never told you to figure out anything. He said to Trust in The Lord with all your heart lean not into your own understanding instead acknowledge him in all your ways and he shall direct your paths. Your paths are ordered and the way was already made. He already knows what you need. He has already supplied all of your needs. You just have to seek the creator of the path to get where you want to go. Be blessed! ~Author Shamieka Dean~ #motivationsbyMieka

You won’t open the book

This morning I was talking with God asking so many questions back to back about many different things. I found myself getting frustrated. In that still small voice he said “You want all the answers but you won’t open the book.” The funny part is I used to do this in school. I would listen to the teachers. I would participate in class but I never studied the book. Ironically, I still made excellent grades on most assignments but I quickly forgot the answers when it was time to take the tests. How many of us do this in our walk with God. We listen to the pastors, teachers, preachers, bishops and evangelists but we don’t take the time to study the word of God. When we go through a test, we get angry and frustrated seeking the answers in everyone else and refuse to open the book. We quickly forget the answers because we failed to take the time to study for ourselves. We fail some of the tests because we didn’t study to show ourselves approved. Long story short, open the book for yourself and study. A person who studies is prepared, they pass the tests and they never forget the lesson. Be blessed! ~Author Shamieka Dean~ #motivationsbyMieka